The test

Sunday morning I was exhausted, I woke up around 5:30 to feed Kyla and she didn't want to go back to sleep. So after numerous attempts to put her back to bed I decided to hold her and enjoy our special time together. Well 9:00 rolled around, I made the girls their breakfast, got Mike his pain med which was supposed to be a motrin, I decided to take one too because I had a horrible headache. (The headache was probably from lack of sleep, Mike got his surgery Thursday and so since Thursday I had been getting up at 3 to give him his meds and ice for his foot, then again at 5 to feed Kyla, then stay up after feeding Kyla because the girls were waking up shortly after I got Kyla back to bed.) So I went to church, which was a blur and come home to realize I had given us both Percocet, no wonder I was a zombie at church. I realize that I am totally at the end of my rope, I find a quiet place (my bathroom) and kneel down and just start crying to my Heavenly Father. I felt so much peace as I finished my prayer and I had an instant burst of energy to get through my day. After that Kyla was sleeping super good, Mike didn't need his meds anymore and life was slowly getting back to normal again. Normal for having a new baby normal. ;) Then what happens another thing to make me stretch and rely on the Lord some more. I couldn't have survived the last 2 days with out the love of my family and ward. I have had phone call after phone call asking how they can help me, I have had emails, facebook messages galore. Thank you all for your love and help. I haven't had to worry once about my girls being taken care of. Who would have thought that I could leave my 1 month old baby and just come home long enough to nurse her. Plus I have had the quiet moments to my self where I can pray and thank my Heavenly Father for sparing the life of my husband. The fear that comes to you when you hear about how I could lose him any time just tore me apart. I just kept thinking have I given to my husband all that I need to give, Have I loved him the way I need to love him. Why do I have to nit pick his every little behavior that drives me nuts. I have realized that all that matters is creating memories with our little girls. Enjoying the simple pleasures of life. Mike is good at that, me not so much unless the house is clean the laundry is done, dinner is made, etc. :) How thankful I am that he is recovering so fast and will be home with us shortly. Again thank you all for your prayers.